Hello, If you like It, I put you an example if my style, I Hope you enjoy It:
"Five situations in which it is not recommended to masturbate you
1. In an alien encounter. Unless the alien masturbates first. In that case it would be quite impolite on our part
2. In case a bear attacks you. It is best to offer him honey and try to caress his muzzle. Then if the bear gets silly it is something else. But that, that arises, nothing to force that the bears are very yours. That in case it is a Russian bear, if it is a Chinese panda then without problem
3. If lightning strikes you. Although if that happens, you're still unlikely to feel like it.
4. When someone has a very long last name and is spelling it for you. I don't quite understand why, but the bear in point 2, if you have been intimidated, may be upset.
5. When a stranger asks you the time: That would cause problems of assimilation of concepts in the client."
If you like It but It is not what you are looking for, I can be more serious and/or polite. We can Talk It chat
Greatings!