Hiya,
I read through your job listing for a comedy writer for your funeral, and i'd like to put my name forward. I'm a voice actor by trade but i have a long history of comedy writing as a hobby, and irreverent humour is my go-to. I'm permanently disabled and like a lot of people in my position i've got a dark, sharp sense of humour - one well suited to suggesting "burn baby burn" as a funerial song... i've also lost family and friends to serious illness so i know how these kinds of things go.
I'm currently working on a guiness world record comedy attempt, so if you'd like to get a feel for my style of comedy i can send you a couple of the five minute sets i've written for that project.
As a voice actor i'm also more than equipped to record the crematorium supervisor part, if you're okay with that role being female. I have a recording booth, Tonor-TC777 microphone and Audacity editing software which i use for VO work, and i'm more than happy to put all of those to work for you.
Your project sounds really different and i'd be honoured to help you craft a send off that actually reflects *you*, instead of the run-of-the-mill stuff. Send me a message i you'd like to take this forward!